Friday, March 6, 2015

Slice of Life Story Challenge - What I Know For Sure - Marriage

     It's Day 6 of the Slice of Life Story Challenge, started by Two Writing Teachers.  I am writing around the theme topic of "What I Know For Sure." (See Day 1 for a full explanation.)
July 1st, 1989

     Yesterday, I wrote about Libby's One Little Word, adventure, and after I posted my slice for the day, I thought of another angle of adventure I could've explored: the adventure of marriage.  In 1989, I said "I do" to Ed Mueller.  I met Ed at the end of my freshman year of college at Miami University.  I had been offered the position of a resident assistant for my sophomore year, and we were meeting the staff of Morris Hall for the first time.  I went with my grade/high school friend, Bobby, since he was also offered a position in the same hall.  Bobby and I were great friends, and were amazed and excited that we were placed in the same hall, so together we speculated who would be on our staff.

     I remember my first impression of Ed.  He was quiet and built like a football player, wore a Miami sweatshirt, and donned a Skoal cap.  He honestly seemed like a "dumb jock," not saying much throughout the evening.  Ed also remembers our first encounter.  He thought Bobby and I were dating, and thought I seemed like a "goody two-shoes."  Not a great "love at first sight" story!  Not to worry - it became a love story nonetheless. I was also to meet one of my future best friends during that staff meeting, Annie.  She was upbeat and fun, and I was drawn to her immediately.

    That year as a Morris Hall R.A. was a memorable one.  At one of our staff retreats, we had to write our wishes for each other, and Ed wrote that he hoped I married a super husband, had perfect kids, and a nice house.  He liked my ability to "make people smile."  I still have that paper!  It wasn't long until I started to "like" him, and we took turns "liking" each other, on and off during the course of the fall semester..  We never seemed to quite perfect our timing that autumn, but in the late winter, we finally began officially dating.  One of our first dates was a Billy Joel concert.  Bobby and Ed ended up spending the night outside in a long line to get those tickets.

     In the summer of 1988, we got engaged.  You can read about that story in this post.  We had a wonderful wedding with family and friends, and celebrated our 25th anniversary this past July 1st.  Amazingly, we have stayed in sync all that time, miraculously making changes and moves in tandem, supporting and encouraging one another through various jobs and career changes, raising children, empty nesting, and making future plans.

25th Anniversary 2014

     My daughter, Libby, and her fiancé, Jamie, will get married in June.  Here is what I know for sure about marriage: A marriage works best if your spouse is your best friend. Establish a sense of confidence in the permanence of your commitment, so when things aren't perfect, you know you still have each other's back.  With this assurance, there is no fear.   Have fun together.  Pray together and make God your foundation.  Be flexible and get ready for change; change together, cheering for each other's accomplishments and dreams.  Respect and love each other. Enjoy each other's company, but be independent. Children are a joy and a blessing, but don't forget to focus on your marriage.  Someday they will move out, and it will be just the two of you.  You better like each other.  And last but not least,  get ready for the adventure of a lifetime.


  1. Holly, I enJOY hearing love stories! Thank you for writing about your love story with Ed. Precious.

    And I love what you shared ...what you know for sure about marriage...Beautiful and wise.

  2. Holly,
    This was a great story about how you met and became best friends before getting married. We agree--keep God your foundation, pray together and have fun. ;)
    Darla & Jen

  3. Wise words. Happy anniversary. I love your ending.

  4. Wow! I, too, am a Miami merger--although much more recently. We were married in 2013. What a small world!

    Your advice is great--be each other's best friend is our marriage's mantra. Thanks for sharing!

    1. My daughter and her fiance will be Miami Mergers, and so are his parents! We'll have to get a picture of all of us and send it to Miami!

  5. Lovely - and I'll bet your daughter will read this and take your wise words much to heart, Holly.

  6. Holly, this is a great story, and your advice-- "what you know for sure", I would totally concur with. It seems my story and yours were happening at the same time, but in different places! I met my husband after his freshman year and my sophomore year in college, however it was the 2nd year for both of us since I had transferred in from another school. We met when we arrived to be Freshman Orientation leaders and were paired together. We started dating later that same year. We were married on July 15, 1989-- two weeks after your wedding. Almost 26 years later, now, we are still going strong-- and I chalk that up to the commitment of our "covenant" with God in our marriage, and the fact that my husband is (still!) my best friend.

    Congratulations to you, and best of luck to you and your daughter as you prepare for the coming wedding! :) Thanks for sharing your story and your wisdom!

  7. It was lovely to read your marriage story. Your "this is what I know to be sure about marriage" list has solid advice. I believe that Libby has learned this just by observing and listening to you and Ed as a couple.

  8. Flexibility and being ready for change is so key. Along with communication. I think the four of us could have a good time together. I love how you are brave enough to write about any subject.

  9. I forgot to tell you how much I loved this post. I'm so grateful I have had such an amazing model of marriage growing up.